He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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