About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I want a musical about memes.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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