Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize