Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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