I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize