you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.