And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.