Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize