I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Shame - the story of my life.
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