Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize