I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.