direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just want to make out with him forever
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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