Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.

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  (503): Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now. http://tfl.nu/gxcf
  Replies (7) Good night (1181) Bad night (2897)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.

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  (860): Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV. http://tfl.nu/ridn
  Replies (2) Good night (546) Bad night (2526)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store

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  (407): she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store http://tfl.nu/25ph
  Replies (86) Good night (14689) Bad night (2481)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.

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  (403): you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off. http://tfl.nu/h9sg
  Replies (17) Good night (1470) Bad night (6396)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me

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  (203): I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me http://tfl.nu/osg9
  Replies (45) Good night (7991) Bad night (1198)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life

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  (847): Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life http://tfl.nu/jn6o
  Replies (19) Good night (6677) Bad night (938)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel

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  (432): the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel http://tfl.nu/t4be
  Replies (18) Good night (3494) Bad night (1282)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.

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  (570): Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood. http://tfl.nu/z2ka
  Replies (13) Good night (3492) Bad night (1263)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.

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  (856): What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today. http://tfl.nu/ecb0
  Replies (4) Good night (1033) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am

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  (703): The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am http://tfl.nu/d51l
  Replies (6) Good night (1708) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.

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  (760): Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security. http://tfl.nu/lxl5
  Replies (9) Good night (1518) Bad night (493)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window

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  (954): I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window http://tfl.nu/x5q3
  Replies (4) Good night (885) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve

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  (937): The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve http://tfl.nu/cdxu
  Replies (1) Good night (1267) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life

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  (970): I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life http://tfl.nu/g4bg
  Replies (2) Good night (322) Bad night (636)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.

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  (956): I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal. http://tfl.nu/q1bu
  Replies (3) Good night (894) Bad night (295)

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