and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything