Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
