I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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