I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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