she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You made out with two different species that night
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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