Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize