He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize