I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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