What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
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Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
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why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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