I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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