You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
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