I think I died a long time ago.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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