i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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