Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Go christen that room with your naked body.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?