p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again