In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.