on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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