You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
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