I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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