Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
