so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
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