Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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