Heybabeimwearingurpanties
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
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