I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize