is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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