It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
