If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
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Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
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It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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