WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize