no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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