apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship