Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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