it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize