Sry I called you an 8
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
