omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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