I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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