You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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