i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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