I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
